


Lessons to Learn

by midnightdiddle (gooseberry)



Category: Final Fantasy XII
Genre: Coming of Age, Families of Choice, Friendship, Team Dalmasca
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-03-26
Updated: 2007-03-26
Packaged: 2019-01-31 04:37:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12674580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gooseberry/pseuds/midnightdiddle
Summary: Penelo learns many things while she's fighting for Dalmasca.She learns kissing from Vaan. Vaan is always there, like a brother, but he's not a brother, and so she kisses him around the corners, while Balthier and Ashe argue over the next course of action. Vaan's lips are dry, and soft, and the kisses are a little bit like home, when Mama and Daddy were still alive, and Vaan still lived with Reks.Vaan kisses her back sometimes, when he's sleepy-eyed and lazy. Other times, Vaan turns his head away, because he hears Basch's heavy steps, and his cheek is almost as soft as his lips, because Vaan is still very much a boy.--Penelo-centric, vague spoilers for the members of Team Dalmasca. It's really a bunch of Team Dalmasca feels.





	Lessons to Learn

Penelo learns many things while she's fighting for Dalmasca.

She learns kissing from Vaan. Vaan is always there, like a brother, but he's not a brother, and so she kisses him around the corners, while Balthier and Ashe argue over the next course of action. Vaan's lips are dry, and soft, and the kisses are a little bit like home, when Mama and Daddy were still alive, and Vaan still lived with Reks.

Vaan kisses her back sometimes, when he's sleepy-eyed and lazy. Other times, Vaan turns his head away, because he hears Basch's heavy steps, and his cheek is almost as soft as his lips, because Vaan is still very much a boy.

Fran teaches her archery, because Rabanastre was too small a place to even draw much of a breath, let alone a bow. Fran is patient, soft-voiced and tender, almost like the memories of Penelo's mother. Penelo learns to love Fran, because Fran is older than all of them, wiser than all of them, and Fran still finds it possible to love them, with all their hume faults.

Penelo follows Fran with a single-minded idealism, and she remembers how she used to cling onto her mother's skirts. Fran is patient, though, always patient, and lets Penelo cry into Fran's hair on the days that Vaan turns his face away.

Basch tells Penelo that she is small, very small, and so teaches her everything he says he would teach a daughter, if he ever had one. But Basch never had a daughter, and probably never will, and so everything he teaches is filled with the wild-eyed hopes of a boy.

It's through Basch that Penelo learns about childhood, because all in all, Basch is still very much a boy. He's a knight who's never grown up, and so Basch still thinks that he can save the world, and Ashe along with it. Penelo is shuffled in along with Ashe, and Basch treats her like a little broken-winged bird, all rough pettings and gruff lullabies. Penelo can't find it in her heart to wake Basch up, and so she leans on Basch's shoulder, and pretends not to wake up when he kisses her forehead.

Penelo learns about love through Ashe. Ashe is full of love, bright and sharp and like a million pieces of glass. Ashe loves Rasler, her father, her many knights, all two years dead. Ashe loves Dalmasca, in all her fallen glory, and Ashe loves Larsa, with all his skewed logic and dreamings. Ashe even loves Archadia, because Ashe can't help but love anything. Love, though, is very similar to hate, and so Penelo watches Ashe, and learns how easy it is to slit the throat of the people you love.

Ashe smiles at Penelo sometimes, when it's late at night and Penelo wants someone to talk to. Penelo smiles back, and Ashe's fingers are cool and smooth around Penelo's wrist. Penelo loves Ashe, because Ashe loves Penelo, and Penelo wonders if someday Ashe will have to slit her throat, too.

Penelo learns about sex from Balthier, because Vaan is turning his face away more and more, because Vaan is always looking for someone else, something else. Balthier is like a Vaan grown up, refined and recast, and Penelo finds herself brushing against him more and more.

Balthier never looks happy, but he never looks sad, either. He's calculating, full of numbers and ideas that should never work, but somehow, Balthier can make everything work. He kisses her around a corner, and she follows him eagerly, like a puppy desperate to please. He teaches her how to touch, and how to gasp, and how to make the world explode into light and sound, until she feels so alive that she's sure she's dying. Then he teaches her how to cry, and he sends her off gently, a broken-winged bird, to Fran, because Balthier was never a stupid man, and Balthier was never a man to play games when there was something larger to catch.

Penelo learns many things from all of them, and when Fran folds Penelo into her arms, Penelo learns that there are somethings that she was better off never knowing.


End file.
